Saturday, March 21, 2009

I'm ready to get my ass kicked....

Into high gear that is....

There's a fitness studio within walking distance of my house. They offer group classes and personal training. Unfortunately they are a bit on the pricey side. After much thought I have made an appointment for a fitness evaluation on Monday. From there my trainer and I will decide if 1) I would ever survive the adult classes offered and 2) if personal training is the best bet. I can't afford to do it for long but am hoping it will kick my ass for a few weeks and then I'll be able to carry it over and continue on my own. The great thing is that they don't have gym equipment, it's a good old fashioned drop and give me 20 kind of workout. That means it's stuff I'll be able to do at home too. I'm nervous about Monday and S nailed it tonight when she said "nervous about what, being judged?" Yup, you got it. Oh well, they've seen worse right? right?

So that's my big leap into the land of exercise. I'll keep walking as well but know I need more. Wish me luck!

Thursday, March 19, 2009

I suck

I'm having problems with a few friends, I guess I'm not as great a friend as I once thought and people are choosing not to spend time with me.

Today I lost my job.

I suck, I'm depressed, things aren't going well.

Oh yea, I'm back up to 286. I suck.

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Plan

Some time ago I came up with a new twist on my eating plan. I had not put it into practice, until today.

I can have a Slim Fast shake for breakfast and I usually make it to lunch before I eat again. The problem is that once I start eating at lunch I can't stop. From 12ish-4ish I am hungry hungry hungry. By the time dinner rolls around at 5:30 I'm full or slightly hungry. Hmmm......

The new plan is to eat my largest meal at lunch time. This means making my own meal or eating a plate leftover from dinner the night before. Now I know this is kind of a no brainer. If you are hungrier at lunch eat more, less hungry at dinner eat less. It sounds simple but to actually put it into practice is difficult. I have a family, with children, and we eat family dinners at the table. I am hoping that it won't be a huge deal and they won't really notice that mommy is eating a tiny serving or perhaps a bowl of cereal instead. What really matters about family dinner time is the family part, not the food part.

I started this today. I made turkey meatballs for spaghetti and meatballs later in the week. I had 4 meatballs in a little red sauce for lunch and a plate of raw veggies. Here's hoping it's enough and that this new plan of mine will work.

Yo-yo

I never could master a yo-yo as a child. Things have NOT changed. I have been yo-yo-ing with 3-5 pounds and am so stuck it's sickening. I have been doing well on the diet front and still I bounce up and down on the scale. I can't get lower than 282 and it's starting to drive me CrAzY.

The weather here is finally starting to change. With the change I am hoping/planning to get out walking again. I had given up on walks for a bit b/c the sidewalks were solid ice and as fun as breaking something would be I decided to stay safe and indoors. I'll start today whether or not I get a walking buddy to go with me. I've also been outside more with the boys and I'm hoping just that slight increase in movement will help.

This week I had a decent amount of money to grocery shop with and it made a huge difference. I was able to buy healthy foods I know I will want to eat and again, have hope it will make a difference.

In other news, life is pretty good right now. My father passed away over a year ago and his probate case finally closed a week ago. It didn't make me rich by any means but things are definitely better. I was able to put a down payment on a new car and I got a new laptop. Both my old car and laptop were limping along and sometimes needed to be shocked back to life. It has been nice to have the newer things and know that I can rely on them. Things have been tight financially for some time. It's a small price to pay for being able to stay home with my boys. This gift from my dad has helped a lot and I still get teary when I think that maybe, just maybe my luck is changing and good things are really happening.

On the surgery front since I am so incredibly stuck I am guessing I will end up on the operating table sometime this summer. I'm not thrilled with the idea but I have to do what I have to do. I was supposed to attend another group meeting the other day and skipped it. I just couldn't do it that day, my heart wasn't in it. There's another one next month that I have to go to in order to keep my surgeon's appt. I will go, no excuses.

So that's all from here. What's happening in your neck of the woods?