OK, maybe that's a bit harsh. I feel more like a derailed train working towards a wreck. For some reason I have been unable to get back on track following this weekends adventures in cookie eating. I have been eating healthy meals but evil cravings keep coming out.
Yesterday I had a bowl of cereal for breakfast and made it all the way until lunch, yay! Lunch was a lean hamburger patty (no bun) and a salad. It was delicious, I felt full and then I heard something. It started out very soft "asdkfshfs". Huh? What? Then it got louder "candy". Finally it was all I could hear "CANDY!!! CANDY!!! CANDY!!!!" OK, I don't really hear voices per se but those are the thoughts that go through my head. I was warned of this by the social worker I met with. Her voices say "donut" and "diet coke". I tried and tried to find other things to do but before I knew it I was chewing away on some Laffy Taffy. UGH!!!!! The rest of the day went pretty well, I ate more than I should have but things were fairly healthy.
On top of the physical ramifications of eating cookies and candy (I am up several pounds AGAIN) their are the mental ones. I have been in a funk. I can't decide if I am in a funk because I haven't been doing well on the diet front or if I'm not doing well on the diet front because I am in a funk. Either way it needs to stop! So if anyone has some tips to pull yourself out of a funk please let me know. I tried cleaning and organizing yesterday (it appeals to my OCD side). I was very successful but felt no better. I wake up every day and declare it will be a better day, it just has to be. So today is it; today will be the better day. Today will be good. Today I will eat well. Today I will go for a walk. Today I will have patience. Today is the day.